What Is Your Center?

"Darkness.  That's the first thing I remember.  It was dark, it was cold and I was scared.  But then... then I saw the Moon.  It was so big and it was so bright.  It seemed to chase the darkness away.  And when it did, I wasn't scared anymore.  Why I was there and what I was meant to do, that I've never known... and a part of me wonders if I ever will."

Rise of the Guardians may be a movie full of childish holiday imagery, but I absolutely love it.  The movie centers around Jack Frost, who knows that he hasn't always been an ice-maker with a freezing cold core.  He longs to find out why he is who he is and why the Man in the Moon called him to be a Guardian.

As I watched this movie with my kids, there were so many things that stuck out to me... so much I identified with.  Jack begged for answers from the Man in the Moon.  "You're the one who put me here!  The least you can do is tell me... tell me why!"  I can't even begin to write how many times I've asked God the same question.  What is it that He wants me to do?  I've tried serving in so many areas in church... I've tried encouraging those around me.  I've shared the gospel with people I meet.  But I still have this emptiness... this feeling that there's more I'm supposed to do.  What is it that God wants me to do with my life?  I've heard so many speakers talk about their journey to discovering God's will for them.  But the common theme is that waiting is hard.  Of course, God realizes this.  The Bible is full of stories of waiting.  The Israelites waited in the wilderness.  David waited for years to become king after he was chosen.  Esther waited for the right moment to approach the king.  In fact, it's interesting to note that the name of God is never mentioned in the book of Esther.  It appears that He was silent, but still He moved on their behalf.  Job waited for answers.  Jeremiah waited for the walls to be built.  Daniel waited in the lions' den.  Jonah waited in the fish's belly.  And that's just a few examples.  "They that wait upon the Lord will renew their strength." (Isaiah 40:31)
But how?  How will we continue to have strength while we wait?  I think we see the answer to that question by looking more closely at the verses leading up to verse 31.

Why do you complain, Jacob?  Why do you say, Israel, "My way is hidden from the Lord; my cause is disregarded by my God"?  Do you not know?  Have you not heard?  The Lord is the everlasting God, the Creator of the ends of the earth.  He will not grow tired or weary, and His understanding no one can fathom.  He gives strength to the weary  and increases the power of the weak.  Even youths grow tired and weary, and young men stumble and fall; but those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength.  They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.

Did you see it?  He will not grow tired or weary.  The Message puts it this way: "God lasts."  We won't lose our strength because HE doesn't lose His strength.  He'll give us the ability to wait until He decides it's time to reveal His will to us.

In the movie, Jack didn't just sit around and wait to discover his purpose.  He spends time with the rest of the Guardians and talks with them about his questions.  In a conversation with Nicholas St. North, it's discovers that his purpose is based on his center.  St. North asks him, "Who are you, Jack Frost?  What is your center?  If Man in Moon chose you, you must have something very special inside."  I think, too often, I disregard the fact that God chose me.  Long before He laid the earth's foundations, He had us in mind.  I am hand picked and hand made by God.  If He made and chose me, do I really believe He'd abandon me here?  Of course not.

Nicholas St. North hands Jack a nesting doll.  As Jack opens each figure, he sees another aspect of St. North.  At the center, he finds a wooden baby with large eyes.  St. North responds: "Yes!  Big eyes, VERY BIG, because they are full of wonder.  That is my center.  It is what I was born with, eyes that have only seen the wonder in everything!  Eyes that see lights in the trees and magic in the air.  This wonder is what I put into the world, and what I protect in children.  It is what makes me a guardian.  It is my center.  What is yours?"  God has made me different than every other person in this world.  He has given us all special and unique gifts that He wants us to use to fulfill our purpose.  But those gifts are not our center.  Our center is the gift-giver.  We're born longing to learn about Him, but not everyone chooses to know Him.  He is the only center that can give us the fulfillment we long for, but we often try to fill that void with other people or things.  I know I have even attempted to fill that void with church and ministry.  But it never completely fills the emptiness. I was born to carry out His will for my life.  And until He tells me what He wants me to do next, I should serve Him using the gifts, talents and interests that He has given me.

There are times when I feel that this is not enough.  Satan knows this and he uses it against me.  He loves to throw doubt in my path and make me feel that there's nothing I can do now.  In the movie, the enemy is Pitch Black.  At one point, Jack ends up in a conversation with him.  Jack insists that he's not afraid of Pitch and Pitch tells Jack that he IS afraid of something.  "It's the one thing I always know: people's greatest fears.  Yours is that no one will ever believe in you.  And worst of all, you're afraid you'll never know why.  Why you?  Why were you chosen?"  I believe that Satan's two greatest weapons, at least in my life, are doubt and delay.

"How can God really love you if He allowed this to happen?"   

"Do you really think that God has a plan for YOU?"

"You aren't ready to serve God now.  Maybe after you've learned more."

"Are you sure you have the talent to serve God?"

Some days, I listen to him.  I doubt God's goodness and the gifts He's given to me.  Other days, I sense the urgency.  We have very little time to do what God has placed us on this earth to do.  We don't have the liberty to doubt God's plan or presence.  He IS with us.  He DOES have a plan for us.  He HAS equipped us.  And while we may not know the specifics of how He wants us to fulfill our purpose, we do know one purpose: go and make disciples.  So, while I wait, I'll go.  I'll share the gospel.  I'll encourage my fellow Christians.  And I'll use my talents in ministry.  And who knows?  Maybe that has been God's plan for me all along.